​​Existence of Cloud

SUN Xin

Ⅰ

In the view of human being on earth, sky stands for the other time and space, where lives gods of ancient Greek, Christianity and Buddhism, created by human on earth. Then looking up at sky becomes a symbolic action，embodied as martyrs praying or ordinaries sighing in trouble. However, motive of my works has no relation with the metaphor meaning of sky, instead, it comes from an incidental looking-up. In 2006, the last series Observing in Process met obstacle from inner of myself and suspended. With an ambivalence emotion, I came to the Northwest of China, under the clear sky. Unfamiliar environment gave me chance to temporarily step out of puzzlement in reality. Facing to the vast expanse of Qinghai Lake, I was enlightened and looked up to the sky, where, on the blue and clear stage, the ever-changing clouds performed tragicomedies representing happiness or sadness, live or death. I was obsessed and then, the new path of works appeared naturally.

Comparing with the inward detection of Observing in Process, theme of Sky and Cloud should seem as outward projection. The traceableness to origin of life usually follows two directions which are mutual mirroring, the one is tracing to the core of spirit and the other is cognizing outer object. Inward tracing and outward exploring, in the Oriental culture context, embodied as the relationship of subject and object, in Western culture context, reflected in dualism philosophy. The developing history of human ideology, on the one hand, reflects individual mental development, on the other hand, preexistently determine individual psychological quality based on race and gender. In visual art fields, body and object act as visual support of inward tracing and outward exploring. Different kinds of metaphysical ideas are represented into multiple images of body and object. According to tradition Chinese painting, the idea of harmony of human and nature creates “Selflessness” landscape, reflecting Zen ideology. In this context, subject is oneness with mountain and water. Though body usually absent in Chinese painting, it still exists in the discourse of tradition art theories. In Western context, body no doubt is generally represented, which contradict to object. General speaking, as the support of subject, body is indispensable for visual representation in the process of integration and sedimentation of civilization, projected with infinite meanings. Many Western masters take body representation as their life experiment field, where the outward feeling was turned into inward exploration in psychological and mental area. Finally, the contradictable explorations condensate into spiritual artworks. Observing in Process could be classified into this creation modality. The specialty of my works is that I pay much attention to the temporality that could be explained as an inpresent and instantaneous encounter of subject and itself. Here both of object and body are main content, which is different from “selflessness” and “oneness of object and subject”, instead, in the course of their mutual mirroring, the existence is lightened and appearing. However, with deeper exploration, inevitably I met self-interrogation from social, psychological and ethical aspects. It was those limited facts from myself that lead to the ending of this series works. As a result, the exploring of unconsciousness located in the deep level of psychological space, finally in a way of outward form, continues in the theme of Sky and Cloud.

In visual art history, sky usually acts as background or unimportant role and seldom represent as main subject. In Chinese tradition landscape, sky was represented with “blank-leaving”. In Western classical landscape, sky was painted with light grey, contradicting to brown used in front view, in order to represent perspective space. Impressionists use small brushes to depict sky, not much different from the classical. In Post-impressionism, Expressionism and other Modernism works, sky is represented with multiple strokes and subjective colors, so as to break away from extroversion of realism and directly relate to inner spirit. As a conclusion, taking sky as purely subject of works, would naturally avoid any forms of duplication and appropriation of schemes in structures of art history, culture history, image history and social history, and cut down any potential metaphoric connection with them, as the same time, have no symbolization of images in history. So the theme of Sky and Cloud is outsides the context of ideological cultural narrative from its beginning, and only could be read and interpreted from aesthetic aspect.

It is a very hard experiment, but as the same time, which leads itself to a comparably pure field. Here I try to make the correspondence, between spirit elements, such as existence and nihility, dynamic and static, heavy and light, visibility and invisibility, and deep psychological movement, appearing automatically, which might happened in the boundary between consciousness and unconsciousness. Truth exists not in the definite condition of consciousness or unconsciousness, but appears at the moment when pressed id unconsciously being revealed in the field of ego. In the process of painting, I revise the handwriting schema to initiate and realize the psychological transformation, so as to be more close to the truth. The schema consisting of freehand stroke and brush trace might be added with much external contents because of the imitation of painting technic, and far from real feeling of subject. That is the reason why Picasso had to roughly add a nose with heavy shadow for Avignon girl. In this way, he aook away the external content added by traditional perspective space schema. In Sky and Cloud series, I was attracted first to the concrete and inconcrete of sky and cloud, then soon, I concentrated on the coincidence of depiction and the revising quality of depiction itself. The first step of painting is rough sketch with freehand style. In this step I definitely realize its unreal, either far from object or inner mirror image. Then comes the willing to revise stroke and color. I follow the willing, instead of deliberate stop and control, to revise the freehand stroke trace. From time to time, in the alternative of freehand drawing and revising, the work is getting close to the inner truth. There is no clear sign to showing the end of work. When it infinite close to the truth, the calm of heart that makes me stop naturally. Only in this moment could I appreciate the painting from its outside, as though review an unconscious dream. But the moment of transformation is transient and unpredicted. The change of cloud corresponds with inner psychological structure and initiates the psychological motivation. As the same time, revising reflects the relation of conscious and unconscious, id and ego. The final painting accumulates the traces of countless moments. The traces record encounter of spirit and object, then, infinitely close to the inner truth, that is the truth of art.

Ⅱ

Pursuit of truth originates from a kind of uncertainty, which is similar to complex, not only embodied as the remembrance of a generation, but also has close relation with individual psychological quality and growing path. Born in 1970’, our adolescence is in the time when social conception strenuous changing. We usually lack of definite value, hesitate, sway between new conception and tradition. Lack of cynical of post 60’, neither have selfness of post 80’, instead we constantly rebuild value system and revise separated feelings. Continuing denial leads to doubt and uncertainty in judgment and decision. The feel of existence usually embodied as insistence to some habits, such as buying the same snacks in the same market around corner, spending festival in a same way, listening the same song of one singer. It seems that only in this way that we could have a moment to stop and enjoy the comfort of the familiarity. Although Post 70’ untiringly chase new things, we are destined reminiscent. The remembrance of adolescence is so deep that it becomes a complex repeated again and again in the later years. Thus, the denial consisting of break and rebuild becomes an unhealed trauma experiment of the generation.  

Uncertainty constructs trauma memory, turning into complex deeply exists in spirit inner core of post 70’. As for me, this complex almost becomes the origin of all the conflicts and instinct of creation. In the earliest remembrance, I was a child out of group, never understanding the rules of group, naturally became a spectator. Children’s play game and adult’s political activity are not much different. From aspects of biology and psychology, children’s play is exercise for the later living in adult world. Individual in groups seems easy controlled by irrational power and covered natural conscience. So group active is easy to generate violence and finally turn into carnival of violence. Being Outside of group gives me security, the condition continues till now. However, outside of group makes me have to find another structure to rely on. In Childhood, following to the rules became a habit and deep into conscious area. All kinds of structure gave me sense of belongingness, gradually turned into bondage with the mature of life. When I realized this point, I wanted to break down the structure, impulsed by a strong reverse power. Then uncertainty and breaking structure construct the psychological motive. I used to accept knowledge in doubt attitude and deconstruct it unconsciously. I keep on in the separate, fragmental and inconstant condition. The more I want to conformity the more I feel separate and could not construct definite system. Perhaps it is just because of this condition, chasing truth becomes a destiny burden.While careful, hesitate and avoidance no doubt are the rightest life style.

Whereas, motion of life need to expand, though only could in the revising and correcting way. Close to the truth is a never-reached target. This condition embodied as erase and rewrite, is to revise the stroke trace in order to close to truth in works, and present as repeat of deconstruct and rebuild in ideological field. During collage time, that was around 1990’, study Western thought was the trend among intellectuals. I was so strongly fascinated with it, that I abandoned Chinese tradition culture and put heart into Western theory, even misunderstanding in a certain extent. Many years later, I studied in Europe and reviewed Western art history in museums. Then I felt the fragmental and shortage of my knowledge and realized the difficulty to rebuild. Comparing to trauma revise, the rebuild of recognition structure and ideology conception should be a repeat and circulate behavior, consisting of breaking and integration, deconstruction and reconstruction. The key point of trauma revising is that present ego backs to the origin of complex, facing the trauma, so as to release its depression. Whereas rebuild of recognition system should take truth as eternal origin and destination, basing on individual present experiment, internalize objective knowledge and idea into subjective consciousness. In the endless process, new knowledge and concept would inevitably conflict with original system, and motivate subject to break it and reconstruct it in a new way. This process is a positive alienated behavior, doubt and uncertainty are the necessary spiritual elements to fulfill it.

Ⅲ

In the globalization cultural context, building ideological system should be in multiple directions and levels. With the background of boundary blurring in all areas of region, time, race and gender, individual life style is gradual similarity. There is no much difference between the “White Collars” on subway in Vienna and people working in CBD of Beijing. It is not hard to imagine that they back home in suburb or go to the bars in downtown, so as to release themselves from their alienated identities, that is the existence of human being in our time. People in different fields would face their own spirit dilemma generated from individual alienation and convergence, which are the two aspects of fact. The condition of individual in different fields is very individualized. Chinese in native could deeply feel that the break of tradition and uncertainty of concept, while overseas Chinese might think more about the lack of cultural identity. Men facing the breaking of patriarchy, have to make new choices. Women might be confused about the reorientation of female identity based on the developing feminism. Because of the economic depression, Western might rethink the old social structure, and how the Western centralism cultural strategy responses to the confliction from Orient……So individuals have to find their own ways in many difficult positions. As a result, how to inherit tradition and accept abroad culture are naturally internalized into self-rebuild behavior destining to explore the inner truth. The self-rebuild should be concrete behavior instead of empty concept.

It should be very cautious to accept and absorb any theory and concept. Which is the right way, to retrace it to its own time or to misunderstand it based on our own need, to locate our comprehension in knowledge structure or to construct self-sufficient system based on individual experiment? Those are all suspended, depending on concrete contexts. In certain condition the facts co-exist, and might different more or less with the change of contexts. Here self-deny, deconstruct and rebuild are necessary methods. During 2007-08 I was a visiting scholar in Europe. Initiated by the change of cultural circumstance, I started to think about cultural identity, interpretation of works and contemporarity related with cultural difference, based on the comparison with Europe artists, most of them are my teachers and classmates in university. Their works could be classified into two trends, the one is facing native social problems, such as immigration, the other concentrates on deduction of concepts in metaphysical area. I feel hard to understand their works for the lack of knowledge about Austrian social condition and tradition. Vice versa, Western artists and theorists are hard to understand Chinese tradition ink painting in deep level either, only could they categorize it into abstract art, for their lack of Chinese tradition aesthetics. As a result, it is always misunderstand and unapprehend when we face the art with different cultural background, for we used to isomorphic alien culture with our own system. Comparing with young artists’ experimental works, it is easier for me to understand classical masterpieces in museums. The fact has been proved by Austrian artists too, who preferred Forbidden Palace to 798 when come to Beijing. People like classical works which integrated cultural essence and explored human spirit core. While contemporary art, either seriously think of social problems or explore into spirit area, could earn strong penetrability. If excellent artworks have certain criteria, then corresponding with truth should be the primary element, which confers works with generality and eternality. So classical works must be contemporary in its own time, likes a mirror honestly reflect time’s society and spirit, no matter positive or negative. It is the truthfulness that confers works into classical avenue. Returning back to classical art is similar to human collective complex. During the course of alienation, human being need to numberless tracing back to truthful spirit core in the substrate of art, and comforted in the self-revise. Cultural identity, art essence and contemporarity, the core elements of artistic creation, not conflicting with each other, but belonging to different dimensions, are not abstract concept but concretely exist in the large boundary of cultural history and art history, and embodied as individual artist’s creation and characterized theoretical comment, meanwhile, from individual aspect, are isomorphic with life experiment and permeate into both metaphysical area and everyday life.  

We individually exist in the time, which is continuing and transient, instantly stops and eternal flows. In our short life experiment, there are always some moments, when from infinite faraway we look at ourselves, who like a piece of dust in the Universe, flowing away with streams. Still there are always some moments, when we submerge deeply into heart, touching the inexplicable sadness and joyfulness. Those moments usually covered by everyday life. Nevertheless, as soon as going into the interval of time, we will inevitably face the question of the meaning of life. Art is not an answer, but a support, an area, where could we comparably release ourselves, closing to the truth and to ourselves, so as to finally go out of the intricate present world and find the eternal home for our spirit. As far as I am, works and words are two different walkways leading to the truth. I enjoy releasing myself to flow with feelings, and look at myself in the encounter with works. Meanwhile, I have to continually arrange the fragmentary ideas, being lightened by civilization, so as to find my way in the heavy mist. When painting, I do not know where I am. In words, I still walk on the way.